Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

9 practices
How long you have · A minute
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone
Theme · When everything feels flat
Staying regulated in conflict 46The moment before you snap 39Choosing your response 36Cool the body first 34Grounding and settling 28What anger actually is 26Your nervous system 25Medication and how it works 25Systems for daily life 24Bringing the future closer 22The fear underneath anger 22Answering bids 22Get started 20Treatment and medication 18Your sense of time 17Equanimity and perspective 17Structure and routine 16Fondness and admiration 15Knowing your partner 14Practising under provocation 14Affection and touch 14Making it stick 14Growing empathy 14Repair after rupture 13Touch and bodywork 13Feelings and focus 12Food, caffeine and fuel 11Getting assessed and diagnosed 11Moving your body 9The cost of avoiding 9When everything feels flat 9Exercise, food and other supports 9Gratitude 9Breathing 9Listening and understanding 8Being seen and judged 8What ADHD actually is 8Treatment and medication 8Tolerate distress 8Screens and attention 7Remembering to do it 7What you are actually defending 6Shame and stigma 6Shared spiritual life 6Rituals of connection 6What worry does 6Shame 5Rebuilding trust 5Feeling from the inside 5Emotions as signals 5Posture and how you carry yourself 5Question the thought 4Self-compassion 4Name what you feel 3When you use something to cope 3Obsessions and compulsions 3Safety and grounding 3Facing it a step at a time 3Panic and the body 2When anger turns to harm 2Calm the body 2Hold a boundary 2Reading, numbers and learning differences 2Let the wave come 2Meaning after harm 2Notice the pattern and flex 2Patience and trust 2Ride the urge 2Righteous anger and perfectionism 2Validate yourself and others 2Working with anger 2Breaking the worry loop 2Your worth is not conditional 2Your window of tolerance 1Rest and pacing 1Act on your values 1When you go numb 1Listen to the body 1Keep the bond 1Help someone grieving 1Get it out of your head 1Face it gently 1Letting it out safely 1Care for yourself in loss 1Ask and say no well 1Anger, alcohol and the body 1
Approach
When

You can say what an SSRI does in one sentence. It blocks the doorway that carries serotonin back out of the gap between two nerve cells, so more of it stays there for longer and is likelier to be picked up.

Worth being able to say plainly, because most people are carrying something vaguer and more frightening than that. It also sets a fair expectation.…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 8:24

The blockade is partial. Serotonin is not trapped in there forever: enzymes still break it down and the transporters that are not blocked carry on working.

That matters for accuracy and it matters for reassurance, because people do picture something flooding and stuck. It also explains why serotonin…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 94:1

Serotonin syndrome comes from stacking, and the second agent is usually something nobody thought to mention: a migraine tablet, a cough medicine, a herbal remedy for low mood.

Triptans, tramadol, dextromethorphan, linezolid and St John's wort all count, as do other antidepressants. Someone who mentions in passing that they…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 12:87

When someone says they react badly to normal doses of almost everything, take it as information about their body rather than as a personality trait.

Bodies differ in how fast they break a medicine down. Give two people the same dose and one of them may be holding far more of it for far longer,…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 65:7

Whether a medicine works can turn on something as ordinary as taking it with food or moving it to bedtime.

Vilazodone is the clear case. On an empty stomach a good deal less of it is absorbed, and the nausea it can cause is easier to sit with overnight…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69

If a medicine leaves you wired, restless or with a pulse that will not settle, report it rather than tolerating it quietly.

The antidepressants that act on noradrenaline as well as serotonin can raise blood pressure and put nerves on edge, and with some of them that grows…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 13:28

The same medicine can be dangerous given one way and safe given another. Slow release is not a marketing word.

Bupropion was pulled from the market over seizures and came back once a slow release form existed, because what drove the risk was the sharp peak…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 12:110

Try putting a sentence between you and the mood: this is what my brain is doing right now. It does not make me a bad person, and it does not mean I cannot cope. It just feels that way today.

Low mood does not arrive labelled as a mood. It arrives as facts about you, that you are useless, that nobody wants you around, and it is very hard…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatParts workQur’an 93:3

When someone tells you they have been hurting themselves, keep your face steady and stay curious. Alarm closes the conversation, and you need it open.

A visible flinch teaches the person that this is not something you can hear, and the next disclosure goes elsewhere or nowhere. It can also make the…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatParts workQur’an 16:127

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.