Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

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54 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone
Theme · When everything feels flat
Medication and how it works 177Your nervous system 120Systems for daily life 114What anger actually is 103Getting assessed and diagnosed 93The moment before you snap 88Choosing your response 81Get started 74Moving your body 71Treatment and medication 71Grounding and settling 71Equanimity and perspective 68Feelings and focus 66Your sense of time 66What ADHD actually is 65Touch and bodywork 65Cool the body first 65Staying regulated in conflict 65Screens and attention 62Exercise, food and other supports 61The fear underneath anger 61Bringing the future closer 60Food, caffeine and fuel 59When everything feels flat 54Practising under provocation 46The cost of avoiding 44Structure and routine 36Growing empathy 36Shame and stigma 35Breathing 35Reading, numbers and learning differences 34What worry does 34Making it stick 33Treatment and medication 31Emotions as signals 30Being seen and judged 30Remembering to do it 27Tolerate distress 27Feeling from the inside 25Knowing your partner 25Facing it a step at a time 24What you are actually defending 24When you use something to cope 24Breaking the worry loop 24Answering bids 24Repair after rupture 19Shame 19Obsessions and compulsions 18Righteous anger and perfectionism 17Rebuilding trust 17Shared spiritual life 17Fondness and admiration 15When anger turns to harm 15Affection and touch 15Posture and how you carry yourself 13Rituals of connection 13Listening and understanding 13Self-compassion 12Question the thought 11Use your strengths 10Gratitude 9Anger, alcohol and the body 8When you go numb 7Panic and the body 5Rest and pacing 5Living with uncertainty 5Letting it out safely 4Meaning after harm 4Safety and grounding 4Act on your values 3Your worth is not conditional 3Notice the pattern and flex 3Calm the body 3Name what you feel 3Working with anger 3Let the wave come 3Help someone grieving 2Your window of tolerance 2Work with your brain 2Find meaning 2Face it gently 2Ride the urge 2Patience and trust 2Care for yourself in loss 2Get it out of your head 2Listen to the body 2Ask and say no well 2Keep the bond 2Hold a boundary 2Validate yourself and others 2
Approach
When

You can say what an SSRI does in one sentence. It blocks the doorway that carries serotonin back out of the gap between two nerve cells, so more of it stays there for longer and is likelier to be picked up.

Worth being able to say plainly, because most people are carrying something vaguer and more frightening than that. It also sets a fair expectation.…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 8:24

The blockade is partial. Serotonin is not trapped in there forever: enzymes still break it down and the transporters that are not blocked carry on working.

That matters for accuracy and it matters for reassurance, because people do picture something flooding and stuck. It also explains why serotonin…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 94:1

Serotonin syndrome comes from stacking, and the second agent is usually something nobody thought to mention: a migraine tablet, a cough medicine, a herbal remedy for low mood.

Triptans, tramadol, dextromethorphan, linezolid and St John's wort all count, as do other antidepressants. Someone who mentions in passing that they…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 12:87

When someone says they react badly to normal doses of almost everything, take it as information about their body rather than as a personality trait.

Bodies differ in how fast they break a medicine down. Give two people the same dose and one of them may be holding far more of it for far longer,…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 65:7

Whether a medicine works can turn on something as ordinary as taking it with food or moving it to bedtime.

Vilazodone is the clear case. On an empty stomach a good deal less of it is absorbed, and the nausea it can cause is easier to sit with overnight…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69

If a medicine leaves you wired, restless or with a pulse that will not settle, report it rather than tolerating it quietly.

The antidepressants that act on noradrenaline as well as serotonin can raise blood pressure and put nerves on edge, and with some of them that grows…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 13:28

The same medicine can be dangerous given one way and safe given another. Slow release is not a marketing word.

Bupropion was pulled from the market over seizures and came back once a slow release form existed, because what drove the risk was the sharp peak…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 12:110

Try putting a sentence between you and the mood: this is what my brain is doing right now. It does not make me a bad person, and it does not mean I cannot cope. It just feels that way today.

Low mood does not arrive labelled as a mood. It arrives as facts about you, that you are useless, that nobody wants you around, and it is very hard…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatParts workQur’an 93:3

When someone tells you they have been hurting themselves, keep your face steady and stay curious. Alarm closes the conversation, and you need it open.

A visible flinch teaches the person that this is not something you can hear, and the next disclosure goes elsewhere or nowhere. It can also make the…

A minuteWhen everything feels flatParts workQur’an 16:127

The chemistry story runs backwards from how it is usually told. Nobody found a low chemical and then built a drug. They noticed what certain drugs did to mood and reasoned back to what must have been missing.

Reserpine emptied out the monoamines and people became depressed. Iproniazid and imipramine raised them and mood lifted. Out of that came the account…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 26:80

Depression is not one thing with one address. Fatigue, blank concentration, lost libido and the loss of pleasure do not all come from the same place, so it helps to name which one you most want moved.

This is why two people with the same diagnosis get offered different tablets. A flat, pleasureless presentation points one way, a fatigued and achey…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 10:57

Ask why the tablets take weeks. That one question sorts the honest accounts of how they work from the tidy story about a chemical being low.

Four competing versions sit under the same umbrella: too little released, reuptake running too hard, too much broken down, or receptors that need an…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 30:50

Nearly all of them do the one thing: keep a monoamine hanging about in the synapse for longer. So when you hear that some other tablet is stronger, be a little sceptical.

Head to head, the differences in how much they lift mood are modest. Where they really differ is in everything else they do to you, and in how well…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 15:88

SSRIs became the default for four reasons, and being more effective is not among them. They are easier to tolerate, taken once a day, far safer in overdose, and cheap as generics.

Tricyclics match them for lifting mood and are dangerous in overdose because of what they do to the heart. MAOIs carry food and drug interactions…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 13:28

The standing side-effect list is sexual difficulty, less appetite, an unsettled stomach, disturbed sleep and headache. Sexual side effects are common, and almost nobody raises them unprompted.

So ask directly, and ask about sleep while you are there. People do not usually announce these things. They quietly stop taking the tablet and say…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 6:125

Stopping suddenly can bring lethargy, nausea, irritability and headache within a few days. That is discontinuation, not the illness coming back.

Timing is the giveaway. Withdrawal starts within days of the last dose and often has a particular feel to it: dizziness, odd electrical zaps, a…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 94:6

Discontinuation gets mistaken for relapse constantly, by clients and by clinicians. The mistake runs in both directions and both directions cost something.

Read withdrawal as relapse and a person concludes they will need the tablet for life, when what they needed was a slower taper. Read a real relapse…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 41:49

Never come off an antidepressant on your own. The taper belongs to the prescriber, and for some drugs it needs to be slower and longer than people expect.

The moment to raise this is before anybody acts, not afterwards. If a client is feeling better and starting to think about stopping, that thought is…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 9:118

One person's side effect is another person's treatment. Sedation is a burden for someone who cannot get out of bed and a gift for someone who cannot get to sleep.

Read the comparison charts that way and they stop being lists of harms. They turn into a set of levers: this one settles, this one gets you moving,…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 93:1

Four things carry most of the difference within the class: how much it sedates, how much it activates, what it does to weight, and what it does to sex.

Before anything is chosen, write down which of the four you cannot live with. Almost nobody is neutral about all four, and the one you will not…

Five minutesWhen everything feels flatMedical and treatmentQur’an 65:7

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.