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Focus, starting, and ADHD
Most advice about focus is written for a brain that starts easily. This area is not. It covers what ADHD actually is, how to make a start when starting is the hard part, how to bring a future consequence close enough to feel, and how to stop paying for it in shame.
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If the same three names keep coming up, compare those three and stop looking. Twenty options will not give you a better answer, only a later one.
Past a handful of choices, more searching adds very little while the cost of deciding keeps climbing, and if you are prone to circling it can stop…
When someone says they feel restless inside, ask what the restlessness wants. Restless to move, or restless to do one particular thing until it feels right?
The two feel similar from the inside and point in different directions. With ADHD it is usually undirected: the legs go, the chair is wrong, you need…
A distracted person can be brought back with a nudge. Someone who has gone elsewhere cannot, and the difference shows itself in a couple of seconds.
Say their name, ask something simple, and watch what returns. Attention that has drifted comes back with a small apology and picks the thread up…
Try not to ask why. If the person knew why, they would probably have sorted it out already, and the question tends to land like an accusation.
Ask what happened just before instead. What was going on, what they felt, what came after, what sort of day it had been. Those answers can be worked…
Some of what looks like muddle is the system's fault. Our tenth month is named for eight, because two months were added later and nobody renamed the rest.
Worth saying to anyone who feels stupid about dates and forms. A calendar whose numbers are out of step, a tax year starting in April, forms asking…
While you are taking the family history, ask about seizure disorders and psychosis too, not only about attention. A family carrying other neurological or psychiatric conditions is worth knowing about whatever you end up concluding.
Keep the list short and ask it plainly: epilepsy, psychosis, learning difficulties, head injuries, anything neurological. Some of it will matter for…
Some people simply cannot get a family history. Refugee journeys, destroyed records, closed adoptions, families that did not survive. That is a gap in the paperwork and not evidence against the diagnosis.
Say so out loud, and write it in the notes as a gap rather than as a negative finding, so the next person reading does not mistake silence for an…
One man put his lamps on a timer so the room would go dark at eleven and send him to bed. It worked for a few nights. Then he simply carried on in the dark. A cue can tell you the time. It cannot make you stand up.
Worth remembering before you build anything clever. If the pull of whatever a person is already doing is stronger than the nudge you have designed,…
'I set a reminder and still did not do it' is not a story about a bad reminder. It tells you the missing piece was never information, and a bigger, louder version of the same thing will fail in the same way.
The reflex is to escalate: three alarms, a different app, an entire new system built on Sunday night. What is needed is a change of kind, something…
Hyperactivity and impulsiveness almost never turn up alone. When restlessness appears with no attention difficulty beside it, that is a reason to ask what else might be going on.
In practice the two run together, and over the years the visible restlessness tends to settle while the attention side stays. So a picture that is…
The diagnostic manual is a document people sat in rooms and argued over. That is no reason to dismiss it, and it is a good reason not to treat it as the last word on you.
Committees weigh how reliably clinicians can agree on a criterion, what the field trials show, what a particular wording will do out in the world.…
The checklists were built around the loud version of this, and girls are more often the quiet version. If she is struggling and nobody has ever suggested an assessment, that is worth pressing on.
Defiance in girls can look like refusal, withdrawal or a long-running argument about friendships rather than the disruption a teacher would report.…
Most autistic people also meet the criteria for ADHD. The other direction is much thinner: only a small minority of people with ADHD meet the criteria for autism.
That is mostly arithmetic rather than mystery. ADHD is the more common of the two, so one overlap looks large from one side and small from the other.…
Autism and ADHD share some surface features and are still two different things. The social difficulty in each arrives by a different road.
With ADHD it tends to be impulsiveness and missing what was going on: the interruption, the thing said too fast, the friend never rung back. With…
A reward that comes every time is easy to walk away from. A reward that turns up unpredictably is the one you cannot put down, and that is exactly how your phone is built.
Sometimes there is something good in the notifications and usually there is not, and it is that uncertainty which keeps you checking. Willpower is…
When you read that some proportion of people with ADHD have a particular problem, the number tells you nothing until you know the figure for everybody else.
Twenty percent sounds alarming until you learn what the rate is in the general population. What matters is the multiple, how many times more likely,…
Hypervigilance after trauma and ADHD scanning look much alike from outside. Often the honest answer is that both are present, and the real question is how much of each.
Watching that comes from threat is aimed at something and tends to switch on in particular situations. ADHD distraction is not fussy about where it…
Damage to the front of the brain can produce something that looks a great deal like ADHD: poor impulse control, blunted judgement, a person their family says has changed.
The nineteenth century railway worker who survived an iron rod through the frontal lobes is the standard illustration, and what altered in him was…
Not every bout of eating too much belongs to an eating disorder. Ask whether how the body looks is part of it, because that is where the two paths separate.
When bingeing comes out of ADHD it is often boredom, or the food simply being there with nothing stepping in to stop it, and the person is not…
Check the licensing before assuming you cannot afford a good instrument. Some come with permission to photocopy once you have bought the manual.
That detail matters most to the clinicians least likely to have a budget, which usually means the services seeing the families with fewest options. A…