Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

14 practices
Area
How long you have
Who it is written for
On your own, or with someone · Involves someone else
Theme · Rebuilding trust
Medication and how it works 61Systems for daily life 37The cost of avoiding 36Screens and attention 26Staying regulated in conflict 24Moving your body 21Treatment and medication 20Knowing your partner 15Exercise, food and other supports 15Rebuilding trust 14Feelings and focus 13What ADHD actually is 13Affection and touch 13What anger actually is 13Listening and understanding 12Repair after rupture 11Answering bids 11Rituals of connection 11Your sense of time 11Breaking the worry loop 11Your nervous system 11The moment before you snap 10Structure and routine 10Shared spiritual life 10Food, caffeine and fuel 10Facing it a step at a time 10Getting assessed and diagnosed 10What worry does 10Grounding and settling 9Bringing the future closer 9Growing empathy 7When everything feels flat 7Breathing 7Treatment and medication 7Get started 7Equanimity and perspective 7Emotions as signals 7Cool the body first 7Choosing your response 7Remembering to do it 6Reading, numbers and learning differences 6When you use something to cope 5Shame and stigma 5Posture and how you carry yourself 5Tolerate distress 4Touch and bodywork 4Panic and the body 3Obsessions and compulsions 3Practising under provocation 3Being seen and judged 3Making it stick 3Righteous anger and perfectionism 3Rest and pacing 2Gratitude 2What you are actually defending 2Ask and say no well 2The fear underneath anger 2Fondness and admiration 2Feeling from the inside 2Help someone grieving 2Shame 2When you go numb 1Safety and grounding 1Validate yourself and others 1Living with uncertainty 1
Approach
When

Offer genuine remorse, not a rushed sorry. Sincere turning back is where the return begins.

Remorse that is felt and shown, not performed to end the discomfort, is the seed of rebuilt trust.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 66:8

Do not rush to analyze why it happened. That comes much later, and never as a way to shift blame.

Digging into causes too early invites excuses and self-blame. First transparency and remorse, then, in time, understanding.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 17:36

Rebuild the small rituals of connection that eroded: predictable, reliable moments you can both count on.

Betrayal usually follows the quiet loss of daily connection. Restore steady rituals you can rely on to reconnect.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 70:23

Name the specific moment your partner was not there when you needed them most, and how deeply it wounded you.

Some wounds are attachment injuries: a betrayal or abandonment at a crucial moment of need that redefines the relationship as unsafe. Healing begins…

Five minutesRebuilding trustEmotionally focusedQur’an 12:86

If you caused the injury, acknowledge your partner's pain, own your part, and stay present with them; do not defend or flee.

The one who caused the wound helps most by receiving the pain, taking responsibility, and expressing genuine regret while staying emotionally…

Five minutesRebuilding trustEmotionally focusedQur’an 3:135

The partner who broke trust answers questions with complete transparency and hides nothing going forward.

Rebuilding trust means an open life: whereabouts, contacts, the truth, offered freely rather than pried out.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 9:119

The one who caused the hurt listens to the pain non-defensively, without excuses, as long as it is needed.

Do not rush the hurt partner or defend yourself. Bear their anger and grief with patience; it is part of repair.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 42:43

Do not try to restore the old marriage. Build a new one, on honesty, transparency, and witnessing each other's truths.

The relationship before cannot be recovered as it was. Aim instead for a second marriage, to the same person, on firmer ground.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 30:21

Aim for real forgiveness that comes with repair, not a cheap forgiveness that papers over the wound to keep the peace.

Forgiving too fast, before atonement and change, buries the injury alive. True forgiveness follows real repair.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 24:22

Let one trustworthy person in slowly. Trust is rebuilt in small, safe steps, not all at once.

You do not owe everyone access, and you do not have to stay walled off forever. One safe person, by degrees.

Five minutesRebuild trustTrauma informedQur’an 3:159

When a past hurt overwhelms you, reach toward a safe person instead of cutting yourself off. Connection is part of healing, not a distraction from it.

Trauma pulls you to withdraw, but isolation is exactly what deepens it. Letting even one trusted person stay close, when everything in you wants to…

Five minutesRebuild trustTrauma informedQur’an 3:103

After a betrayal, heal by talking the injury through together, fully, rather than skipping past it in silence.

Couples who avoid the subject drift apart; those who talk it through, honestly and thoroughly, are the ones who make it.

Twenty minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 2:42

Atonement is not only apology; it is changed behavior over time. Let your actions become the apology.

Words open the door; sustained new behavior walks through it. Trust returns through consistency, not speeches.

Twenty minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 25:70

Let the hurt partner set the pace of healing. It takes as long as it takes; there is no rushing trust back.

You cannot demand that trust return on a schedule. Honor the injured partner's timeline without pressure.

Twenty minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 2:286

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.