Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

13 practices

Rituals of connection Me Clear all

How long you have

A minute 6 Five minutes 3 Twenty minutes 4

Who it is written for · Me

My husband or wife 13 Me 13

On your own, or with someone

Involves someone else 11 On my own 2

Theme · Rituals of connection

Medication and how it works 155Your nervous system 113Systems for daily life 103What anger actually is 89 The moment before you snap 88 Choosing your response 81 Get started 73 Grounding and settling 67 Equanimity and perspective 66 Moving your body 63 Cool the body first 61 Staying regulated in conflict 60 Food, caffeine and fuel 59 Feelings and focus 58 The fear underneath anger 58 Bringing the future closer 58 Your sense of time 58 Touch and bodywork 56 Getting assessed and diagnosed 50 What ADHD actually is 48 Exercise, food and other supports 46 Practising under provocation 46 When everything feels flat 44 Treatment and medication 42 Screens and attention 40 Breathing 34 Growing empathy 34 Shame and stigma 30 Being seen and judged 30 Making it stick 30 Structure and routine 28 Remembering to do it 26 Tolerate distress 26 Knowing your partner 25 Treatment and medication 25 What worry does 25 Answering bids 24 Breaking the worry loop 23 What you are actually defending 23 Feeling from the inside 23 When you use something to cope 22 Emotions as signals 22 Repair after rupture 19 Facing it a step at a time 18 Shared spiritual life 17 Rebuilding trust 17 Affection and touch 15 Fondness and admiration 15 Obsessions and compulsions 14 Rituals of connection 13 Posture and how you carry yourself 13 Righteous anger and perfectionism 13 Listening and understanding 13 Shame 13 Self-compassion 12 Question the thought 11 Use your strengths 10 Gratitude 9 Anger, alcohol and the body 8 The cost of avoiding 7 Living with uncertainty 5 When anger turns to harm 5 Rest and pacing 5 When you go numb 5 Letting it out safely 4 Safety and grounding 4 Meaning after harm 4 Act on your values 3 Panic and the body 3 Notice the pattern and flex 3 Name what you feel 3 Working with anger 3 Your worth is not conditional 3 Let the wave come 3 Calm the body 3 Face it gently 2 Your window of tolerance 2 Listen to the body 2 Ride the urge 2 Reading, numbers and learning differences 2 Care for yourself in loss 2 Get it out of your head 2 Keep the bond 2 Hold a boundary 2 Validate yourself and others 2 Ask and say no well 2 Help someone grieving 2 Find meaning 2 Patience and trust 2 Work with your brain 2

Approach

Gottman 6 Core 5 Emotionally focused 2

When

Any ordinary day 7 Coming and going 5 Something good 1

Before you leave today, find your spouse and say goodbye properly, face to face.

Not a shout from the door. A real parting, a word about when you will be back.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:62

When you come home today, find your spouse before anything else, and give a full minute.

Before the post, the phone, the fridge. Them first, with your eyes and attention.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:62

Do not let leaving or arriving happen silently.

Today, mark both thresholds. Before you leave, find your spouse and say goodbye properly, face to face. When you come back, find them before you do…

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 4:19

When you come home, find them first, before the post, the phone, the kitchen.

The first half-minute of reunion often sets the tone for the whole evening.

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 30:21

Say plainly when you are here and for how long, so they never have to guess.

Naming your presence is a small gift that removes the guesswork of whether you are reachable.

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 17:34

Before you part in the morning, take two minutes to learn one thing happening in your partner's day.

A short chat and a warm goodbye at parting keeps you connected through the hours apart.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 4:86

Keep one daily moment to reconnect, a few minutes that are only about the two of you.

Morning coffee, the walk, the goodnight. A small daily island of us.

Five minutesRituals of connectionEmotionally focusedQur’an 25:62

Choose one small daily ritual and protect it this week. Same time, phones away.

The morning tea, the evening walk, the goodnight. Small, repeated, only yours.

Five minutesRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:62

Go to bed at the same time tonight.

Small shared rhythms, sleeping and waking and eating together, are the scaffolding of closeness.

Five minutesRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 30:21

Once this week, sit together unhurried and share one feeling and one reassurance.

Not logistics. How are we really, and what do you need from me. A regular heart to heart.

Twenty minutesRituals of connectionEmotionally focusedQur’an 30:21

Mark one milestone together this month, however small, rather than letting it pass.

The anniversary, the finished project, the hard season survived. Pause and honour it.

Twenty minutesRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 14:7

Share one meal today with nothing else happening, no screen, no rush.

Undivided attention over something ordinary is a small daily ritual of belonging.

Twenty minutesRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 4:19

Keep a weekly date, just the two of you, to keep learning each other with open questions.

A regular two hours together, asking about dreams and hopes, keeps your map of each other current.

Twenty minutesRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:74

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.