Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

6 practices

Rituals of connection A minute Clear all

How long you have · A minute

A minute 6 Five minutes 3 Twenty minutes 4

Who it is written for

My husband or wife 6 Me 6

On your own, or with someone

Involves someone else 4 On my own 2

Theme · Rituals of connection

Staying regulated in conflict 46 The moment before you snap 39 Choosing your response 36 Cool the body first 34 Grounding and settling 28 What anger actually is 26 Your nervous system 25 Medication and how it works 25 Systems for daily life 24 Bringing the future closer 22 Answering bids 22 The fear underneath anger 22 Get started 20 Treatment and medication 18 Your sense of time 17 Equanimity and perspective 17 Structure and routine 16 Fondness and admiration 15 Practising under provocation 14 Growing empathy 14 Affection and touch 14 Making it stick 14 Knowing your partner 14 Touch and bodywork 13 Repair after rupture 13 Feelings and focus 12 Getting assessed and diagnosed 11 Food, caffeine and fuel 11 When everything feels flat 9 Gratitude 9 Exercise, food and other supports 9 Breathing 9 The cost of avoiding 9 Moving your body 9 Listening and understanding 8 Being seen and judged 8 What ADHD actually is 8 Treatment and medication 8 Tolerate distress 8 Remembering to do it 7 Screens and attention 7 Shared spiritual life 6 What you are actually defending 6 Shame and stigma 6 Rituals of connection 6 What worry does 6 Feeling from the inside 5 Emotions as signals 5 Shame 5 Posture and how you carry yourself 5 Rebuilding trust 5 Question the thought 4 Self-compassion 4 Obsessions and compulsions 3 When you use something to cope 3 Facing it a step at a time 3 Name what you feel 3 Safety and grounding 3 Righteous anger and perfectionism 2 Ride the urge 2 Patience and trust 2 Panic and the body 2 Validate yourself and others 2 Notice the pattern and flex 2 Meaning after harm 2 Working with anger 2 Breaking the worry loop 2 Your worth is not conditional 2 Let the wave come 2 Reading, numbers and learning differences 2 Hold a boundary 2 Calm the body 2 When anger turns to harm 2 Rest and pacing 1 Care for yourself in loss 1 Anger, alcohol and the body 1 Keep the bond 1 Act on your values 1 When you go numb 1 Ask and say no well 1 Help someone grieving 1 Your window of tolerance 1 Get it out of your head 1 Face it gently 1 Letting it out safely 1 Listen to the body 1

Approach

Gottman 3 Core 3

When

Coming and going 5 Any ordinary day 1

Before you leave today, find your spouse and say goodbye properly, face to face.

Not a shout from the door. A real parting, a word about when you will be back.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:62

When you come home today, find your spouse before anything else, and give a full minute.

Before the post, the phone, the fridge. Them first, with your eyes and attention.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:62

Do not let leaving or arriving happen silently.

Today, mark both thresholds. Before you leave, find your spouse and say goodbye properly, face to face. When you come back, find them before you do…

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 4:19

When you come home, find them first, before the post, the phone, the kitchen.

The first half-minute of reunion often sets the tone for the whole evening.

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 30:21

Say plainly when you are here and for how long, so they never have to guess.

Naming your presence is a small gift that removes the guesswork of whether you are reachable.

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 17:34

Before you part in the morning, take two minutes to learn one thing happening in your partner's day.

A short chat and a warm goodbye at parting keeps you connected through the hours apart.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 4:86

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.