Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

13 practices

Rituals of connection Coping, mostly Clear all

How long you have

A minute 6 Five minutes 3 Twenty minutes 4

Who it is written for

Me 13 My husband or wife 13

On your own, or with someone

Involves someone else 11 On my own 2

Theme · Rituals of connection

Medication and how it works 104Systems for daily life 70 Getting assessed and diagnosed 63 Your nervous system 61 Staying regulated in conflict 60 What anger actually is 60 Moving your body 48 Get started 48 Equanimity and perspective 46 Choosing your response 44 Bringing the future closer 43 The moment before you snap 43 The fear underneath anger 42 Exercise, food and other supports 41 Your sense of time 40 Treatment and medication 39 Touch and bodywork 38 Feelings and focus 38 Screens and attention 32 When everything feels flat 32 What ADHD actually is 30 Growing empathy 28 Grounding and settling 27 Structure and routine 26 The cost of avoiding 26 Knowing your partner 25 Food, caffeine and fuel 24 Answering bids 24 What worry does 23 Practising under provocation 22 Treatment and medication 20 Emotions as signals 20 What you are actually defending 20 Cool the body first 20 Making it stick 19 Repair after rupture 19 Breathing 19 Being seen and judged 18 Rebuilding trust 17 Shared spiritual life 17 Righteous anger and perfectionism 16 Affection and touch 15 Fondness and admiration 15 Shame and stigma 14 Breaking the worry loop 14 Listening and understanding 13 Remembering to do it 13 Rituals of connection 13 Feeling from the inside 12 When you use something to cope 11 When anger turns to harm 11 Reading, numbers and learning differences 10 Tolerate distress 10 Gratitude 9 Facing it a step at a time 9 Self-compassion 8 Use your strengths 8 Obsessions and compulsions 6 Anger, alcohol and the body 6 Question the thought 5 Meaning after harm 4 Posture and how you carry yourself 4 Safety and grounding 4 Let the wave come 3 Calm the body 3 Act on your values 3 Name what you feel 3 Notice the pattern and flex 3 Panic and the body 3 Shame 3 Working with anger 3 Your worth is not conditional 3 Work with your brain 2 Your window of tolerance 2 Validate yourself and others 2 Care for yourself in loss 2 Ask and say no well 2 Ride the urge 2 Rest and pacing 2 Patience and trust 2 Listen to the body 2 Keep the bond 2 Hold a boundary 2 Help someone grieving 2 Get it out of your head 2 Find meaning 2 Face it gently 2 Living with uncertainty 1 When you go numb 1

Approach

Gottman 6 Core 5 Emotionally focused 2

When

Any ordinary day 7 Coming and going 5 Something good 1

Before you leave today, find your spouse and say goodbye properly, face to face.

Not a shout from the door. A real parting, a word about when you will be back.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:62

When you come home today, find your spouse before anything else, and give a full minute.

Before the post, the phone, the fridge. Them first, with your eyes and attention.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:62

Do not let leaving or arriving happen silently.

Today, mark both thresholds. Before you leave, find your spouse and say goodbye properly, face to face. When you come back, find them before you do…

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 4:19

When you come home, find them first, before the post, the phone, the kitchen.

The first half-minute of reunion often sets the tone for the whole evening.

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 30:21

Say plainly when you are here and for how long, so they never have to guess.

Naming your presence is a small gift that removes the guesswork of whether you are reachable.

A minuteRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 17:34

Before you part in the morning, take two minutes to learn one thing happening in your partner's day.

A short chat and a warm goodbye at parting keeps you connected through the hours apart.

A minuteRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 4:86

Keep one daily moment to reconnect, a few minutes that are only about the two of you.

Morning coffee, the walk, the goodnight. A small daily island of us.

Five minutesRituals of connectionEmotionally focusedQur’an 25:62

Choose one small daily ritual and protect it this week. Same time, phones away.

The morning tea, the evening walk, the goodnight. Small, repeated, only yours.

Five minutesRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:62

Go to bed at the same time tonight.

Small shared rhythms, sleeping and waking and eating together, are the scaffolding of closeness.

Five minutesRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 30:21

Once this week, sit together unhurried and share one feeling and one reassurance.

Not logistics. How are we really, and what do you need from me. A regular heart to heart.

Twenty minutesRituals of connectionEmotionally focusedQur’an 30:21

Mark one milestone together this month, however small, rather than letting it pass.

The anniversary, the finished project, the hard season survived. Pause and honour it.

Twenty minutesRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 14:7

Share one meal today with nothing else happening, no screen, no rush.

Undivided attention over something ordinary is a small daily ritual of belonging.

Twenty minutesRituals of connectionCoreQur’an 4:19

Keep a weekly date, just the two of you, to keep learning each other with open questions.

A regular two hours together, asking about dreams and hopes, keeps your map of each other current.

Twenty minutesRituals of connectionGottmanQur’an 25:74

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.