Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

38 practices
How long you have · Five minutes
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone
Theme · Your sense of time
Medication and how it works 111Your nervous system 73What anger actually is 60Getting assessed and diagnosed 59Equanimity and perspective 44Touch and bodywork 43Systems for daily life 40The moment before you snap 39Exercise, food and other supports 39Your sense of time 38What ADHD actually is 37When everything feels flat 35Get started 35Grounding and settling 35Choosing your response 35Screens and attention 31Treatment and medication 31Food, caffeine and fuel 30The fear underneath anger 29Feelings and focus 29Practising under provocation 28Bringing the future closer 27Moving your body 24What worry does 23Cool the body first 23Shame and stigma 20Emotions as signals 19Breathing 19Feeling from the inside 17Structure and routine 16The cost of avoiding 16What you are actually defending 16Remembering to do it 15Reading, numbers and learning differences 15Breaking the worry loop 15Being seen and judged 14Growing empathy 14Facing it a step at a time 13Treatment and medication 12Making it stick 12When you use something to cope 12Righteous anger and perfectionism 11Obsessions and compulsions 11Tolerate distress 11When anger turns to harm 9Rebuilding trust 9Staying regulated in conflict 9Knowing your partner 8Shame 7Self-compassion 7When you go numb 6Posture and how you carry yourself 6Question the thought 5Listening and understanding 5Shared spiritual life 4Use your strengths 3Living with uncertainty 3Rituals of connection 3Work with your brain 2Act on your values 2Panic and the body 2Meaning after harm 2Rest and pacing 2Find meaning 2Anger, alcohol and the body 2Repair after rupture 2Let the wave come 1Face it gently 1Letting it out safely 1Your worth is not conditional 1Working with anger 1Your window of tolerance 1Calm the body 1Affection and touch 1Ask and say no well 1Help someone grieving 1Get it out of your head 1Notice the pattern and flex 1
When

Nobody works five hours straight. If your estimate assumes you will, then the shortfall gets read as you being slow rather than as the estimate being wrong.

For anything long, put the breaks into the number before you start. Say four hours of work plus the standing up, the kettle, the two interruptions,…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 40:61

If an hour of real work reliably eats two hours of clock, book two. You do not have to become a better estimator to end up with a schedule that works.

Take a fortnight of honest evidence and work out your own number. Some people run at one and a half, some nearer three, and it shifts with the type…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 36:38

The inner clock does more than one job. It tells you what time it is now, how long that took, how long things usually take, and it taps you on the shoulder when a particular time arrives.

Worth finding out which of those is weak for you, because they need different props. Someone who estimates badly needs a record of past attempts to…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 23:113

Some people do not really perceive time passing. It is more like weather, something you are inside of, and then it is suddenly six o'clock.

If that is you, the useful word is perception rather than attitude. Being late is not a statement about what you value, though you have probably been…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 17:12

Short sleep is often not a sleep problem at all. It is midnight arriving without being noticed, on top of a day whose work got pushed into the evening.

If that is the shape of it, advice about winding down will keep missing. What tends to help is an alarm for going to bed, the same as the one for…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 78:10

Rushing out of the door is the most reliable way to leave something behind. The hurry uses up the very attention that would have checked for the keys.

The answer is not to remember harder, it is to move the check earlier. Pack the bag the night before and leave it by the door, and give yourself a…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 21:37

People rarely stop at you are late. They move on to what sort of person is late, and then it is about respect and reliability rather than about time. You have probably taken that account on board yourself.

Naming the jump out loud helps, at home and at work: this is a difficulty with timing, here is what I am putting in place, and it is not a comment on…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 17:11

Set the limit while you are calm and let the device hold it. A computer that shuts itself down at half past ten is arguing with nobody, which is why it wins.

Screens, browser blockers, a plug timer on the television: pick whichever you will not immediately undo. The point is to move the decision away from…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 17:78

A list on the back of an envelope, made before the day starts, beats holding the day in your head. It does not have to be neat and it does not have to survive contact with the morning.

Write what has to happen and roughly in what order, and keep it where you will see it. Two things come out of that. You have made one deliberate…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 17:12

People put the meeting in the diary and not the shower, the finding of the keys or the twenty minutes on the bus. The event gets planned as though standing up puts you in the room.

Give preparation and travel their own lines in the calendar, with their own start times. If the meeting is at two and it takes half an hour to get…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 65:3

Long stretches of time are where people dissolve. If a whole afternoon is unusable for you, stop trying to use it as an afternoon and cut it into pieces with edges.

Twenty five minutes on, five off, or forty and ten, or whatever suits the work. What you are after is a short enough run that you can tell from…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 84:19

A child who is blind to time is not ignoring the deadline. They are living in whatever is happening right now, with no sense that the bell is close or that Friday's test has anything to do with today.

It shows up as reacting to each moment rather than moving through a day with a shape. Adults read that as not caring, and the child usually cannot…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 21:37

The pattern usually ends the same way. Nothing feels urgent, then the deadline lands all at once, and the child panics and produces something poor or nothing at all.

Once you can see the sequence, you can step in near the beginning instead of managing the wreckage at the end. Say it out loud with the child,…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 18:23

If the test is on Friday and it is Monday, Friday is doing almost no work. Put something today on the end of today's revision, however small.

This is not spoiling a child. It is matching the reward to the timescale they can actually feel, which is roughly the one they are living in. Half an…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 78:11

If the only real feedback a child gets arrives every ten weeks, it will not shape a single Tuesday. A report at the end of term is a record, not a motivator.

This is worth saying gently to teachers and to parents who feel that grades ought to be motivation enough. For this child they are not, and no amount…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 18:19

For younger children, make the reward small, concrete and soon. Stickers, points, a smiley face, five minutes of something good, handed over the same hour rather than at the end of the week.

Points that build towards something bigger work well, as long as the point itself arrives immediately. Hourly is not too often for a young child, and…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 11:114

Keep consequences for the sake of honesty, but let praise and reward do most of the work. Punishment can tell a child what to stop and it cannot tell them what to do instead.

Children with this difficulty collect an extraordinary amount of correction over a childhood, from teachers, from parents, from other children.…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 30:17

Go looking for the moment the child does the thing you have been asking for, and say so while it is still happening. Most of us watch for the problem and only notice the good behaviour when we have run out of trouble.

It helps to decide in advance what you are hunting for, so that starting the homework without being asked, or waiting a turn, actually registers…

Five minutesYour sense of timeADHD skillsQur’an 25:62

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.