Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

1725 practices

Coping, mostly Clear all

Area

Focus, starting, and ADHD 631Anger 377Your body 235Your marriage 224Worry and anxiety 120Low mood and hard feelings 96 After harm 17 Grief and loss 13 Yourself and your limits 12

How long you have

A minute 553Five minutes 822Twenty minutes 265Longer 85

Who it is written for

Me 1457A practitioner 1384Someone I care about 874My husband or wife 312

Where you are right now · Coping, mostly

Coping, mostly 1725Struggling right now 731Getting ready for something 391

On your own, or with someone

On my own 1158Involves someone else 413Both of us together 154

Theme

Medication and how it works 104Systems for daily life 70 Getting assessed and diagnosed 63 Your nervous system 61 What anger actually is 60 Staying regulated in conflict 60 Moving your body 48 Get started 48 Equanimity and perspective 46 Choosing your response 44 Bringing the future closer 43 The moment before you snap 43 The fear underneath anger 42 Exercise, food and other supports 41 Your sense of time 40 Treatment and medication 39 Feelings and focus 38 Touch and bodywork 38 Screens and attention 32 When everything feels flat 32 What ADHD actually is 30 Growing empathy 28 Grounding and settling 27 The cost of avoiding 26 Structure and routine 26 Knowing your partner 25 Food, caffeine and fuel 24 Answering bids 24 What worry does 23 Practising under provocation 22 Cool the body first 20 Emotions as signals 20 Treatment and medication 20 What you are actually defending 20 Breathing 19 Repair after rupture 19 Making it stick 19 Being seen and judged 18 Rebuilding trust 17 Shared spiritual life 17 Righteous anger and perfectionism 16 Affection and touch 15 Fondness and admiration 15 Breaking the worry loop 14 Shame and stigma 14 Remembering to do it 13 Listening and understanding 13 Rituals of connection 13 Feeling from the inside 12 When anger turns to harm 11 When you use something to cope 11 Reading, numbers and learning differences 10 Tolerate distress 10 Facing it a step at a time 9 Gratitude 9 Use your strengths 8 Self-compassion 8 Anger, alcohol and the body 6 Obsessions and compulsions 6 Question the thought 5 Safety and grounding 4 Meaning after harm 4 Posture and how you carry yourself 4 Act on your values 3 Your worth is not conditional 3 Panic and the body 3 Notice the pattern and flex 3 Name what you feel 3 Let the wave come 3 Working with anger 3 Shame 3 Calm the body 3 Find meaning 2 Face it gently 2 Validate yourself and others 2 Help someone grieving 2 Patience and trust 2 Hold a boundary 2 Keep the bond 2 Care for yourself in loss 2 Rest and pacing 2 Your window of tolerance 2 Listen to the body 2 Work with your brain 2 Ask and say no well 2 Ride the urge 2 Get it out of your head 2 Living with uncertainty 1 When you go numb 1

Approach

ADHD skills 404Medical and treatment 321Core 314Body based 172CBT 146Gottman 108Mindfulness 102Emotionally focused 86 DBT skills 28 Trauma informed 21 Grief 13 Narrative 7 Parts work 3

When

Any ordinary day 1296Under stress 223After a row 131In a change 37 Coming and going 26 When apart 6 Something good 6

Offer genuine remorse, not a rushed sorry. Sincere turning back is where the return begins.

Remorse that is felt and shown, not performed to end the discomfort, is the seed of rebuilt trust.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 66:8

Do not rush to analyze why it happened. That comes much later, and never as a way to shift blame.

Digging into causes too early invites excuses and self-blame. First transparency and remorse, then, in time, understanding.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 17:36

Deliberately hold your partner's good qualities in mind, and let cherishing crowd out resentful thoughts.

After trust is rebuilding, nurture cherishing: recall and dwell on what you value in them, on purpose.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 25:74

Rebuild the small rituals of connection that eroded: predictable, reliable moments you can both count on.

Betrayal usually follows the quiet loss of daily connection. Restore steady rituals you can rely on to reconnect.

A minuteRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 70:23

Wanting comfort when you are hurting is a built-in human need, not a weakness to be ashamed of. Let yourself ask.

The urge to seek closeness and reassurance in distress is wired into us from childhood. Honouring that need, rather than judging it, is part of how…

A minuteRebuild trustTrauma informedQur’an 27:62

Name the specific moment your partner was not there when you needed them most, and how deeply it wounded you.

Some wounds are attachment injuries: a betrayal or abandonment at a crucial moment of need that redefines the relationship as unsafe. Healing begins…

Five minutesRebuilding trustEmotionally focusedQur’an 12:86

If you caused the injury, acknowledge your partner's pain, own your part, and stay present with them; do not defend or flee.

The one who caused the wound helps most by receiving the pain, taking responsibility, and expressing genuine regret while staying emotionally…

Five minutesRebuilding trustEmotionally focusedQur’an 3:135

The partner who broke trust answers questions with complete transparency and hides nothing going forward.

Rebuilding trust means an open life: whereabouts, contacts, the truth, offered freely rather than pried out.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 9:119

The one who caused the hurt listens to the pain non-defensively, without excuses, as long as it is needed.

Do not rush the hurt partner or defend yourself. Bear their anger and grief with patience; it is part of repair.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 42:43

A betrayal is the choice of the one who made it. Unhappiness never forced it, and it is not the hurt partner's fault.

A struggling marriage is one thing; how a person responds to it is their own choice. Do not carry blame that is not yours.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 6:164

Do not try to restore the old marriage. Build a new one, on honesty, transparency, and witnessing each other's truths.

The relationship before cannot be recovered as it was. Aim instead for a second marriage, to the same person, on firmer ground.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 30:21

Aim for real forgiveness that comes with repair, not a cheap forgiveness that papers over the wound to keep the peace.

Forgiving too fast, before atonement and change, buries the injury alive. True forgiveness follows real repair.

Five minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 24:22

Let one trustworthy person in slowly. Trust is rebuilt in small, safe steps, not all at once.

You do not owe everyone access, and you do not have to stay walled off forever. One safe person, by degrees.

Five minutesRebuild trustTrauma informedQur’an 3:159

When a past hurt overwhelms you, reach toward a safe person instead of cutting yourself off. Connection is part of healing, not a distraction from it.

Trauma pulls you to withdraw, but isolation is exactly what deepens it. Letting even one trusted person stay close, when everything in you wants to…

Five minutesRebuild trustTrauma informedQur’an 3:103

After a betrayal, heal by talking the injury through together, fully, rather than skipping past it in silence.

Couples who avoid the subject drift apart; those who talk it through, honestly and thoroughly, are the ones who make it.

Twenty minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 2:42

Atonement is not only apology; it is changed behavior over time. Let your actions become the apology.

Words open the door; sustained new behavior walks through it. Trust returns through consistency, not speeches.

Twenty minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 25:70

Let the hurt partner set the pace of healing. It takes as long as it takes; there is no rushing trust back.

You cannot demand that trust return on a schedule. Honor the injured partner's timeline without pressure.

Twenty minutesRebuilding trustGottmanQur’an 2:286

Most of what we call memory looks backwards. The kind that actually runs your week is the other sort: a plan that has to show up in your head at the one moment you could still act on it.

So when something gets missed, the question is not really whether you knew about it. You almost certainly did, at the time you agreed to it. What…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 59:18

A thought you have in the car about something to say at home is worth nothing until the person is actually there in front of you. Cues have to sit where the action becomes possible, not where you happened to think of it.

Picture where you will be at the moment the thing can be done, and put the reminder there: a note on the front door for something that happens on the…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 62:9

The moment you think of it is the only moment you are certain to have it. Do the thing, or write it down, or set the alarm, or put something odd in your pocket that will make no sense later until you check.

The two seconds of holding it in mind while you finish what you are doing is usually where it disappears. So make capture the reflex instead of the…

A minuteRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 9:105

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.