Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

35 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone · On my own
Theme · What ADHD actually is
Your nervous system 81Medication and how it works 69Get started 61Systems for daily life 52What anger actually is 50Your sense of time 48Food, caffeine and fuel 43The moment before you snap 42Choosing your response 41Exercise, food and other supports 40Moving your body 37What ADHD actually is 35Treatment and medication 34Bringing the future closer 33Equanimity and perspective 33Grounding and settling 31The fear underneath anger 30When everything feels flat 29Screens and attention 28Touch and bodywork 27Structure and routine 25Getting assessed and diagnosed 25Practising under provocation 24Shame and stigma 22Feelings and focus 22Making it stick 20Treatment and medication 19What worry does 19Cool the body first 19Being seen and judged 18Remembering to do it 17Growing empathy 17Breathing 17When you use something to cope 15Feeling from the inside 15What you are actually defending 13Fondness and admiration 12Reading, numbers and learning differences 12Obsessions and compulsions 10Answering bids 10Tolerate distress 10Righteous anger and perfectionism 10Staying regulated in conflict 9Use your strengths 8Self-compassion 8Knowing your partner 8Shared spiritual life 7Breaking the worry loop 7Facing it a step at a time 7Gratitude 7Question the thought 6Anger, alcohol and the body 6Emotions as signals 6Posture and how you carry yourself 5Shame 4Living with uncertainty 3Your worth is not conditional 3When you go numb 3Notice the pattern and flex 3When anger turns to harm 3Repair after rupture 2Act on your values 2Meaning after harm 2Keep the bond 2Get it out of your head 2Find meaning 2Face it gently 2Work with your brain 2Rest and pacing 2Listen to the body 1Rebuilding trust 1Safety and grounding 1Your window of tolerance 1Panic and the body 1The cost of avoiding 1Affection and touch 1Care for yourself in loss 1Listening and understanding 1
When · Any ordinary day

The name is a little misleading. What tends to be hard is not seeing or understanding a task, it is getting your brain to switch on for something it finds no reward in, and to switch off from something it loves.

You may have noticed you can lose four hours to something that grips you and then be unable to start a ten minute form. That gap is the thing itself,…

A minuteWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 92:4

There is a real difference between a person who will not start and a person who cannot get started, and with ADHD it is nearly always the second.

This matters most in how you speak to yourself, and in how the people near you speak to you. Refusal invites pressure and punishment, which reliably…

A minuteWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 6:165

With ADHD the one dependable thing is that you are not dependable in the same way each day. A day when everything works and a day when nothing does can arrive with no reason you can find.

Say this out loud to the people who need to know, because the good days get held against you later, by them and by you. Plan around your average…

A minuteWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 2:286

ADHD does not look the same in two people. If someone tells you that you cannot have it because you are calm, or organised at work, or did well at school, they are describing one version of it.

Two people with the same diagnosis can look nothing alike: one talkative and always moving, the other quiet and away inside their own head. Other…

A minuteWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 30:22

Roughly one person in twenty has ADHD, and the figure holds up across very different countries. You are not part of a modern trend.

That number matters in two directions. It means you are not rare, so in a class of thirty or an office of forty there will be others. It also means…

A minuteWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 49:13

More people being recognised is not the same as more people having it. What has changed over recent decades is awareness, not the number of minds built this way.

Parents often carry a quiet fear that something they did, or something modern, caused this. Grandparents with the same traits simply grew up without…

A minuteWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 13:8

When you speak about a death by suicide, say died by suicide or completed suicide rather than committed. Committed sets a crime beside the person's name.

Families hear these words at the worst moment of their lives and carry them for years afterwards. The wording also reaches people who are struggling…

A minuteWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 17:70

Being able to disappear into something for six hours does not cancel the diagnosis out. Getting stuck on and getting stuck off are the same switch failing in two directions.

People often use their own absorption as evidence against themselves, or a family member uses it against them: if you can play that game all night,…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 51:21

If you reach the bottom of a page and nothing has stayed, reading it again more slowly usually will not fix it. Change something about how you are reading instead.

Read a paragraph and then say it back in your own words before moving on, or write one line per section, or read with a pen underlining as you go.…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 20:115

ADHD tends to run in families, and the differences in reported rates between countries say more about how a country counts than about its people.

It is common to find, part way through your own assessment, that you are recognising a parent, a sibling or a child. That is not a coincidence and it…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 3:6

Before you decide who in front of you looks like ADHD, notice the picture you are already carrying. The loud boy gets sent for assessment and the quiet, drifting girl often does not.

The research on how race affects who gets diagnosed is genuinely mixed, and it is more honest to read the studies than to adopt a position from a…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 53:32

When you meet a confident claim about ADHD, look it up before passing it on. A search of recent papers, limited to the last few years, takes a couple of minutes and often changes the picture.

Free scholarly search engines will show you abstracts without an institutional login. Two habits do most of the work: filter by date so you are…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 39:9

You will see wildly different figures for how many children still have ADHD as adults. The range mostly reflects what is being counted: symptoms on a childhood list, or whether life is actually being made harder.

Counted by childhood symptom lists, many people look as though they grew out of it. Counted by whether it still gets in the way, far more have not.…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 76:2

With ADHD, self-management usually runs a few years behind the birthday. Expecting a child to handle what other children their age handle sets you both up to fail.

A rough working guide many clinicians use is to expect around two thirds of the chronological age for this kind of self-regulation, so an eighteen…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 4:28

A child who is tall for their age gets treated as older, and with ADHD their self-management may be running years behind. Pitch what you expect to the skills in front of you rather than to the height.

This lands hardest at school, where a big ten year old who cannot sit still reads as defiant rather than young for his skills. It is worth saying…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 2:286

Not knowing a child's family history is not evidence against ADHD. Where a child is adopted, a blank family history should keep the question open rather than close it.

Assessment leans a good deal on family history, and adoption often means that history is simply unavailable. An unknown gets read as a negative,…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 3:6

Anything that gives a quick lift, a bet, a purchase, speed, a risk taken late at night, pulls harder when your brain is short of reward. The workable move is not more willpower, it is putting friction between you and the thing.

Friction is a delay you build while you are calm: the card left at home, the app deleted, a rule that anything over a set amount waits until…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 21:37

Many people who end up in trouble with the law have never had their ADHD recognised. Behaviour read as defiance can be the same difficulty with stopping and thinking ahead.

That is not a claim that ADHD explains crime, and most people with ADHD never go near a courtroom. It does mean that where impulsive trouble keeps…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 6:152

The same mistake costs far more when you have no money behind you. Legal trouble is not handed out evenly, and that sits on top of the earning difficulties ADHD already brings.

This is worth naming when somebody is carrying shame about a record: what happened was shaped by what they could afford at the time and not only by…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 49:13

Driving is one long attention task with a very high cost of failure, so it is worth deliberately giving yourself more margin than you think you need.

In practice: phone out of reach and silent, route set before you move off, nothing to eat at the wheel, and no long drives on short sleep. If a…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 16:78

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.