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Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

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24 practices

When you use something to cope Clear all

How long you have

A minute 3 Five minutes 12 Twenty minutes 5 Longer 4

Who it is written for

A practitioner 24 Me 22 Someone I care about 17

Where you are right now

Coping, mostly 11 Struggling right now 9 Getting ready for something 4

On your own, or with someone

On my own 19 Involves someone else 5

Theme · When you use something to cope

Medication and how it works 177Your nervous system 120Systems for daily life 114What anger actually is 103Getting assessed and diagnosed 93 The moment before you snap 88 Choosing your response 81 Get started 74 Moving your body 71 Treatment and medication 71 Grounding and settling 71 Equanimity and perspective 68 Feelings and focus 66 Your sense of time 66 Cool the body first 65 Touch and bodywork 65 Staying regulated in conflict 65 What ADHD actually is 65 Screens and attention 62 The fear underneath anger 61 Exercise, food and other supports 61 Bringing the future closer 60 Food, caffeine and fuel 59 When everything feels flat 54 Practising under provocation 46 The cost of avoiding 44 Growing empathy 36 Structure and routine 36 Breathing 35 Shame and stigma 35 What worry does 34 Reading, numbers and learning differences 34 Making it stick 33 Treatment and medication 31 Emotions as signals 30 Being seen and judged 30 Tolerate distress 27 Remembering to do it 27 Knowing your partner 25 Feeling from the inside 25 Breaking the worry loop 24 What you are actually defending 24 Facing it a step at a time 24 When you use something to cope 24 Answering bids 24 Shame 19 Repair after rupture 19 Obsessions and compulsions 18 Rebuilding trust 17 Righteous anger and perfectionism 17 Shared spiritual life 17 Affection and touch 15 Fondness and admiration 15 When anger turns to harm 15 Listening and understanding 13 Posture and how you carry yourself 13 Rituals of connection 13 Self-compassion 12 Question the thought 11 Use your strengths 10 Gratitude 9 Anger, alcohol and the body 8 When you go numb 7 Panic and the body 5 Living with uncertainty 5 Rest and pacing 5 Safety and grounding 4 Letting it out safely 4 Meaning after harm 4 Name what you feel 3 Your worth is not conditional 3 Act on your values 3 Calm the body 3 Working with anger 3 Notice the pattern and flex 3 Let the wave come 3 Ask and say no well 2 Keep the bond 2 Hold a boundary 2 Help someone grieving 2 Validate yourself and others 2 Work with your brain 2 Your window of tolerance 2 Face it gently 2 Patience and trust 2 Ride the urge 2 Find meaning 2 Care for yourself in loss 2 Get it out of your head 2 Listen to the body 2

Approach

DBT skills 18 Medical and treatment 6

When

Any ordinary day 19 In a change 2 Under stress 2 Coming and going 1

Set small rewards for staying off it and let them grow the longer you go, so the next one is always near and a slip costs something you can feel.

A vague future benefit competes badly with something available right now. A jar you add to daily, a treat at day three and a bigger one at day ten, a…

LongerWhen you use something to copeMedical and treatmentQur’an 79:40

If cutting down has failed over and over, that is information rather than a verdict on you. For some people the workable goal turns out to be none rather than less.

Starting young makes this more likely, and the earlier the heavy use began the harder the road back to casual use tends to be. Nobody enjoys hearing…

LongerWhen you use something to copeDBT skillsQur’an 5:90

If the language of a recovery group puts you off, that is a reason to look for a different group, not a reason to decide that help is not for you.

Programmes vary a lot in how they talk. Some lean on surrender to a higher power, others are built around self-management and practical tools, and…

LongerWhen you use something to copeDBT skillsQur’an 29:69

The useful part is not the chart on the wall. It is that the person could think of things to do instead, and that took months of quiet work to arrive at.

Someone else's list of alternatives will not hold, because they thought of theirs and you did not. Build yours slowly, adding what has genuinely…

LongerWhen you use something to copeDBT skillsQur’an 29:69

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.