Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

15 practices

Affection and touch Clear all

How long you have

A minute 14 Five minutes 1

Who it is written for

Me 15 My husband or wife 15

On your own, or with someone

Involves someone else 13 On my own 2

Theme · Affection and touch

Medication and how it works 177Your nervous system 120Systems for daily life 114What anger actually is 103Getting assessed and diagnosed 93 The moment before you snap 88 Choosing your response 81 Get started 74 Moving your body 71 Treatment and medication 71 Grounding and settling 71 Equanimity and perspective 68 Feelings and focus 66 Your sense of time 66 Staying regulated in conflict 65 Touch and bodywork 65 What ADHD actually is 65 Cool the body first 65 Screens and attention 62 The fear underneath anger 61 Exercise, food and other supports 61 Bringing the future closer 60 Food, caffeine and fuel 59 When everything feels flat 54 Practising under provocation 46 The cost of avoiding 44 Structure and routine 36 Growing empathy 36 Shame and stigma 35 Breathing 35 Reading, numbers and learning differences 34 What worry does 34 Making it stick 33 Treatment and medication 31 Emotions as signals 30 Being seen and judged 30 Tolerate distress 27 Remembering to do it 27 Feeling from the inside 25 Knowing your partner 25 What you are actually defending 24 Answering bids 24 When you use something to cope 24 Facing it a step at a time 24 Breaking the worry loop 24 Repair after rupture 19 Shame 19 Obsessions and compulsions 18 Rebuilding trust 17 Righteous anger and perfectionism 17 Shared spiritual life 17 Fondness and admiration 15 Affection and touch 15 When anger turns to harm 15 Posture and how you carry yourself 13 Listening and understanding 13 Rituals of connection 13 Self-compassion 12 Question the thought 11 Use your strengths 10 Gratitude 9 Anger, alcohol and the body 8 When you go numb 7 Living with uncertainty 5 Rest and pacing 5 Panic and the body 5 Safety and grounding 4 Letting it out safely 4 Meaning after harm 4 Name what you feel 3 Working with anger 3 Your worth is not conditional 3 Notice the pattern and flex 3 Let the wave come 3 Calm the body 3 Act on your values 3 Listen to the body 2 Patience and trust 2 Care for yourself in loss 2 Get it out of your head 2 Keep the bond 2 Hold a boundary 2 Help someone grieving 2 Validate yourself and others 2 Ask and say no well 2 Work with your brain 2 Face it gently 2 Your window of tolerance 2 Ride the urge 2 Find meaning 2

Approach

Emotionally focused 8 Core 5 Gottman 2

When

Any ordinary day 7 Under stress 6 After a row 1 Coming and going 1

When your spouse is hurting today, be the place they come to, not one more thing to manage.

Move toward the pain, not away. A hand, a nearness, a steady I am here.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 9:40

When fear or hurt makes you want to hide today, reach for your spouse instead.

The instinct is to withdraw. Do the opposite: move toward, take a hand, let them in.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 9:40

When your spouse reaches today, respond with tenderness before anything else.

Not advice, not a fix. First a soft word or a warm hand, then the rest.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 3:159

After a hard moment today, hold each other before you move on.

Words can wait. A held embrace after conflict settles the body and the bond.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 2:187

Give your spouse one embrace today that lasts longer than usual, until you both soften.

A hug held past the polite second. Long enough for the shoulders to drop.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 2:187

When your spouse is overwhelmed today, sit close and let your calm steady them.

You do not have to fix it. A steady body beside a flooded one helps it settle.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 9:40

Offer your spouse warm touch today with nothing asked in return.

A hand on the shoulder, a passing squeeze. Contact that is only kindness, not a request.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 2:187

Let your presence be the place your spouse can fall apart safely today.

No performance required with you. Make your nearness the one place they can just be.

A minuteAffection and touchEmotionally focusedQur’an 2:187

Make one greeting or parting linger a few seconds longer than usual today.

A held hug at the door, a real kiss, not the quick automatic one. Let it last.

A minuteAffection and touchGottmanQur’an 30:21

Touch them once today with nothing else attached.

A hand on the shoulder as you pass. Sitting close on the sofa. Reaching for their hand while you talk about nothing. No agenda, no next step. Just…

A minuteAffection and touchCoreQur’an 30:21

Hold their hand while you talk about something completely ordinary.

Touch with no request attached is a language of safety all its own.

A minuteAffection and touchCoreQur’an 30:21

When they are upset, move physically closer before you say anything.

Nearness often comforts before any words can, and asks nothing in return.

A minuteAffection and touchCoreQur’an 30:21

Make them laugh once today, on purpose.

Shared lightness is not frivolous; it is a thread that keeps two people close.

A minuteAffection and touchCoreQur’an 2:187

Kiss, hold, and touch each other daily, at partings, reunions, and before bed. Learn the touch your partner likes.

Affection is not only for special moments. Small, regular touch keeps warmth and closeness alive.

A minuteAffection and touchGottmanQur’an 30:21

Do one small, slightly ridiculous thing together.

A shared bit of play refreshes a couple more than another serious conversation can.

Five minutesAffection and touchCoreQur’an 2:187

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.