Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

27 practices

Remembering to do it Clear all

How long you have

A minute 7 Five minutes 15 Twenty minutes 5

Who it is written for

Me 26 Someone I care about 24 A practitioner 22 My husband or wife 8

Where you are right now

Coping, mostly 13 Struggling right now 8 Getting ready for something 6

On your own, or with someone

On my own 20 Involves someone else 6 Both of us together 1

Theme · Remembering to do it

Medication and how it works 177Your nervous system 120Systems for daily life 114What anger actually is 103Getting assessed and diagnosed 93 The moment before you snap 88 Choosing your response 81 Get started 74 Moving your body 71 Treatment and medication 71 Grounding and settling 71 Equanimity and perspective 68 Feelings and focus 66 Your sense of time 66 Cool the body first 65 Touch and bodywork 65 Staying regulated in conflict 65 What ADHD actually is 65 Screens and attention 62 The fear underneath anger 61 Exercise, food and other supports 61 Bringing the future closer 60 Food, caffeine and fuel 59 When everything feels flat 54 Practising under provocation 46 The cost of avoiding 44 Growing empathy 36 Structure and routine 36 Breathing 35 Shame and stigma 35 What worry does 34 Reading, numbers and learning differences 34 Making it stick 33 Treatment and medication 31 Emotions as signals 30 Being seen and judged 30 Tolerate distress 27 Remembering to do it 27 Knowing your partner 25 Feeling from the inside 25 Breaking the worry loop 24 What you are actually defending 24 Facing it a step at a time 24 When you use something to cope 24 Answering bids 24 Shame 19 Repair after rupture 19 Obsessions and compulsions 18 Rebuilding trust 17 Righteous anger and perfectionism 17 Shared spiritual life 17 Affection and touch 15 Fondness and admiration 15 When anger turns to harm 15 Listening and understanding 13 Posture and how you carry yourself 13 Rituals of connection 13 Self-compassion 12 Question the thought 11 Use your strengths 10 Gratitude 9 Anger, alcohol and the body 8 When you go numb 7 Panic and the body 5 Living with uncertainty 5 Rest and pacing 5 Safety and grounding 4 Letting it out safely 4 Meaning after harm 4 Name what you feel 3 Your worth is not conditional 3 Act on your values 3 Calm the body 3 Working with anger 3 Notice the pattern and flex 3 Let the wave come 3 Ask and say no well 2 Keep the bond 2 Hold a boundary 2 Help someone grieving 2 Validate yourself and others 2 Work with your brain 2 Your window of tolerance 2 Face it gently 2 Patience and trust 2 Ride the urge 2 Find meaning 2 Care for yourself in loss 2 Get it out of your head 2 Listen to the body 2

When

Any ordinary day 20 After a row 5 In a change 1 Under stress 1

You will still forget things. What decides how much damage a missed task does is usually the ten minutes after you notice, not the miss itself.

Two moves reliably make it worse: sinking into shame until you cannot look at the person, and defending yourself as though nothing had been dropped.…

Five minutesRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 18:24

The standard was never that you drop nothing. It is that the effort is steady and visible, and the misses that remain get some grace.

This matters as much for the person waiting on you as it does for you. Perfection gives them nothing to notice and gives you nothing to reach, so…

Five minutesRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 2:286

The more one person checks up, the more the other hides, and the more they hide the more the checking looks justified. Both are responding reasonably to the last move and nobody is having a good time.

Getting out of it usually means the monitoring comes down first, which feels like the wrong direction to whoever is doing the monitoring. A workable…

Twenty minutesRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 3:159

There is a point where a to do list stops being a tool and becomes something you flinch away from. If you have not opened yours in a fortnight, it has passed that point.

The usual advice is to work through it, which is precisely what nobody does with a list that long. It is kinder and quicker to start a fresh page…

Twenty minutesRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 18:24

Take one of the gaps you already have, the commute or the walk or the shower, and use it to ask what is coming up this week and what might be slipping. No new tool, no new app, just the question.

That turns something accidental into something you can count on. It works best in the same place each time, so that the place starts asking the…

Twenty minutesRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 24:37

Anything that comes round every month should be leaving your account without you. Direct debits and standing orders take the remembering out of the job altogether, which beats any reminder you could set.

It is worth an afternoon. List what recurs, automate what can be automated, and put one calendar note to check the statement each month instead of…

Twenty minutesRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 23:8

Every extra step in a task is another place to lose it. Three clicks and done beats a process with a form, an envelope and a walk to the postbox, even when the second one saves a little money.

Before you commit to a routine, count its steps, then take some out. Bin bags stored next to the bin, stamps kept with the envelopes, paying on the…

Twenty minutesRemembering to do itADHD skillsQur’an 16:91

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.