Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

Narrowed down

93 practices
How long you have
Who it is written for
Where you are right now
On your own, or with someone
Theme · Getting assessed and diagnosed
Medication and how it works 177Your nervous system 120Systems for daily life 114What anger actually is 103Getting assessed and diagnosed 93The moment before you snap 88Choosing your response 81Get started 74Grounding and settling 71Treatment and medication 71Moving your body 71Equanimity and perspective 68Feelings and focus 66Your sense of time 66Touch and bodywork 65What ADHD actually is 65Cool the body first 65Screens and attention 62Exercise, food and other supports 61The fear underneath anger 61Bringing the future closer 60Staying regulated in conflict 60Food, caffeine and fuel 59When everything feels flat 54Practising under provocation 46The cost of avoiding 44Structure and routine 36Growing empathy 36Breathing 35Shame and stigma 35Reading, numbers and learning differences 34What worry does 34Making it stick 33Treatment and medication 31Being seen and judged 30Emotions as signals 30Tolerate distress 27Remembering to do it 27Knowing your partner 25Feeling from the inside 25Breaking the worry loop 24When you use something to cope 24Answering bids 24What you are actually defending 24Facing it a step at a time 24Repair after rupture 19Shame 19Obsessions and compulsions 18Shared spiritual life 17Rebuilding trust 17Righteous anger and perfectionism 17When anger turns to harm 15Affection and touch 15Fondness and admiration 15Posture and how you carry yourself 13Listening and understanding 13Rituals of connection 13Self-compassion 12Question the thought 11Use your strengths 10Gratitude 9Anger, alcohol and the body 8When you go numb 7Panic and the body 5Rest and pacing 5Living with uncertainty 5Letting it out safely 4Meaning after harm 4Safety and grounding 4Your worth is not conditional 3Working with anger 3Act on your values 3Calm the body 3Notice the pattern and flex 3Name what you feel 3Let the wave come 3Validate yourself and others 2Find meaning 2Care for yourself in loss 2Listen to the body 2Ride the urge 2Patience and trust 2Help someone grieving 2Keep the bond 2Face it gently 2Hold a boundary 2Work with your brain 2Ask and say no well 2Your window of tolerance 2Get it out of your head 2
Approach
When

Carry the rough proportions into every ADHD assessment. Executive function difficulty in the great majority, coordination difficulty in around half, dyslexia in something like a quarter to two fifths. A workup that never asks about handwriting, sport or reading is not finished.

The behaviour problem you were called about is often the visible end of an unidentified reading or coordination difficulty. Ask what PE is like, what…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 16:43

It runs the other way as well. Among children referred for dyslexia, a sizeable minority also have ADHD and many have coordination difficulties too. Whatever is written on the referral, treat it as one part of the picture.

Where the reading difficulty is severe, motor involvement is more likely to be there alongside it, which is why the first look should be wider than…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 49:6

Dyspraxia and developmental coordination disorder are the same thing carrying different passports. Search only the American term and you will miss a large European literature on assessing and helping these children.

Search both, and try the older names while you are there. It matters most when you are looking for what actually helps, since much of the…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 2:32

When a bright, talkative autistic child arrives looking mainly behavioural, look underneath for a coordination or reading difficulty. Once the first label is in place, whatever comes after tends to get filed under it and never assessed on its own.

Watch for the child who does well in conversation and badly on paper, or who is fine in class and miserable at PE. Those gaps are usually a second…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 50:16

Expect more anxiety, low mood, drinking and drug use in the young people coming through now. And expect the boys to say less about it, so go looking for irritability, trouble and substances instead of waiting to be told.

Ask parents what they are seeing rather than only what they have been told, and ask the young person directly and privately. Screening that rests on…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 21:83

Parents with one affected child often ask what they might do differently before the next one. Answer honestly: there are lists of suggestions in circulation, the evidence behind most of them is thin, and the question underneath is usually about blame.

Take the question seriously and take the guilt seriously alongside it. Give what is genuinely known, say plainly where recommendations run ahead of…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 2:286

Keep the tasks short, a couple of minutes each, with results back the same day. A long test given to a child who cannot sustain attention measures how long they can last, not the thing you were trying to measure.

Brevity is not a convenience you are allowing yourself. It is what keeps the data honest, and it keeps the child willing for whatever you ask next.…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 65:7

Choose the subtests that answer the question you were actually asked, and read whatever reports the family already has before adding anything of your own. Children arrive with thick folders, and they also arrive with nothing at all.

Where occupational therapy, speech and language or neuropsychology have already covered ground, do not cover it again for the sake of a complete…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 20:26

When you explain executive function to parents and teachers, four words will do: attention, reasoning, speed, memory. Each one can be worked on, and four is a number people can still repeat at the school gate a week later.

The academic models have a dozen headings and nobody outside the field retains them. A short list gives parents something to hang observations on, so…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 2:31

Two referrals turn up again and again. A young child being asked to leave a school for behaviour, with no developmental or cognitive information anywhere in the file. And a parent saying something is wrong while the school says everything is fine. Both are describing adult frustration rather than a formulation.

In each case the first job is the same: get some data. Not another opinion, not another meeting, but something measured about how this child thinks…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 17:36

If you cannot remember much about being six, you are in the majority. Early childhood comes back poorly for most adults, while the teenage years are far easier to describe.

So do not sit in an assessment feeling you have failed a test because the early years are a blur. Bring what you can find instead: old school…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 2:286

A list of symptoms on its own does not make a diagnosis. What counts is that they cost you something real in at least two areas of ordinary life.

That means work or school, money, home, friendships, driving, getting through the week. Almost everyone loses keys and drifts off in meetings, so the…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 24:61

Much of the symptom wording was written with children in mind. If a question sounds like it is about someone climbing the furniture, translate it into your adult life rather than answering no.

Restlessness at forty is rarely running about. It is being unable to sit through a film, the leg going under the table, two jobs left out of boredom.…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 91:8

Attention and impulse problems that appear for the first time in middle age or later are not ADHD arriving late. They need a doctor to look, not a prescription.

Several conditions affecting the frontal lobes can show up first as new disinhibition, poor judgement or a change in personality, and some are…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 21:7

Ask about food two generations back. What the parents were like about it, what the grandparents were like, what the rules were at the table.

Much of how a person eats was learned long before anybody mentioned a diagnosis, and a fair amount of the shame around it was learned in the same…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 49:13

The scales worth using are the ones that ask about situations rather than symptoms alone. Home, school, work, and what actually happens in each.

A questionnaire counting how often somebody loses their keys will label half the population. What a diagnosis needs is evidence that the difficulty…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 24:61

Executive function scales ask how the week actually went. That is often more use than an afternoon of testing in a quiet room.

Office testing happens in the best conditions a person will ever meet: no interruptions, someone sitting with them, a clear finish line in sight.…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 39:9

Ask about the family properly: parents, brothers and sisters, children, then aunts, uncles and grandparents. Include drinking and drug use, in them as well as in the person sitting with you.

This tends to be the highest yield few minutes of an assessment, because the condition runs strongly in families. Relatives who were never assessed…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 12:87

Ask for the most frightening moment of their life, then the next one down, then the next, until there is a scale running from one to a hundred. You get the ladder you needed, and they get something they did not expect: fear comes in sizes.

Do it slowly and write it in their words rather than yours. Most people arrive believing anxiety is one solid block that either has hold of them or…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 21:83

The family history is not the warm up before the real assessment. Give it proper time and it will often tell you more than any single rating scale in the folder.

Walk through the family rather than asking one summary question about it. Who struggled at school, who could never sit through a meal, who changed…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 49:13

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.